The Reason People Don't Grow

Why is it that some folks never seem to make it past a certain point spiritually? Why do some Christians wind up doing things they never would have dreamed? Why is it that some folks get into situations that are so emotionally debilitating and spiritually stifling that it seems like the only available option is to give up? Well, I think the answer to that question is actually shockingly simple. Let’s dig right in:

Okay, you guys know that in my day job, I’m one of the pastors of a little church in Tennessee. And look, I love my job and my church family like crazy. It’s an awesome place filled with folks who love Jesus. At the same time, I see lots of people who are really hurting and really struggling. Sometimes, people are in the middle of a crisis that is so bad, they can’t see any possible way out of it. Over the past decade, I have had the unique opportunity of seeing people at their most desperate moment and helping them figure out how to walk through it. When people are at the end of their rope, we are the folks they call. 

As I said, I love that. I love being the guy people come to once the ceiling caves in. The only thing is, in almost every case, if those folks had called me up a few weeks or even a few days earlier, I could have saved them a lot of heartache and damage. You see, the simple answer to the reason so many people either don’t grow or else wind up in the middle of a code-red type of mess is that they waited too late to call for help.

Guys, one of the enemy’s oldest tricks is simply to isolate people. He wants to get you off by yourself so that he can just kick your butt all over the place. You see, if you’re by yourself, you think you’re alone. You think you’re the only one struggling. You think there is no answer and no way out of your problems. When you’re isaolated, you think whatever the devil tells you to think. Before you know it, you’re confused, you’re depressed and you’re crossing a million lines and making tons of compromises that are tanking your already difficult situation. 

The answer to this problem is as simple as the problem itself. Ready? (And listen up, because what I’m about to say is seriously ground-shifting kind of stuff) Here goes: Give someone a back-stage pass to your life. Find someone you trust who loves you, loves Jesus and knows Scripture and then open your heart to them. Put a welcome mat on the doorway of your life. Give this person an all-access, back-stage pass. Be honest with them. If you cross a tiny little line, let them know. If you’re scared about something, let them in. If you’re feeling beat up and tired and down and out, tell them. I know so many situations that could have been completely avoided if those people would have given someone a back-stage pass. It’s how you grow. It’s how you keep yourself from doing the stupidest stuff ever and it’s how you tell the enemy to take his sad little tricks somewhere else. Open up your life. Be honest. Find someone that rocks and give them a back-stage pass.

A Simple Key to Spiritual Heath

Are you spiritually dry? Are you down and out? Are you upset and confused and on edge? I know exactly how you feel. I go through those emotions and situations quite often, but I want out. I want to find a way to walk through this life and encounter those types of days with less and less frequency… but how? When we go through days like that, what causes them, and what do we need to do to get out?

Now, it may sound funny, but I’ve actually found an answer to this question right smack dab in the middle of the Christmas story. Hang with me and I’ll show you what I mean: You see, when I find myself frustrated, angry, fed up and spiritually empty, there is one thing I automatically know about myself. This thing that I know about me is simple. It may sound trite. It may seem too obvious to be for real, but I completely believe it’s true. Here goes: Sometimes, when we are in the midst of our deepest problems, we are confused and disoriented, which makes us think that the answer to our problems must also be very complicated, but the truth is, the answer is simple. See, more often than not, the reason we can’t find a way out of those tough times is that we have forgotten simple truths. 

I was reading the account in Luke chapter 1 of where the angel Gabriel appeared to Mary and made a prophecy/request. Would she be willing to bring the Messiah into the world? Would she willingly enter into a difficult situation for the sake of the Promised One? Now, as you know, Mary agreed. She said yes. The thing that really struck me in this account was the information that Gabriel gave her about Jesus, about God and about herself. She learned so many basic, simple and important things in just a few short sentences, and really, every time Mary struggled spiritually from that day on for the rest of her life, it was because she had forgotten those simple truths she heard that day.

But here’s the really cool thing: Those things that Mary learned about herself are also true of you and me right now… simple, basic and massively important truths that can be life-changing to such a degree that forgetting them could be catastrophic. So, let’s look at them. What did Mary learn that is also true of us and so important that we need to always remember?

1. God loves me right now, just the way I am
2. God has specific, and detailed plans for my life that are powerfully in motion
3. The spiritual realm is not only real, it’s more real than this world
4. I am an integral part of something huge and miraculous
5. I get to be a part of the Messiah’s family - connected to the King of all

Those are simple things, but they are all completely true, and I know that for me - when I am down, depressed, frustrated, disappointed, insecure or feeling sorry for myself - that means there is an item or two on that list that I have forgotten. There is something that’s true of me that I don’t really believe. When I find myself there, I need to go back to the truth and hold onto it like my life depended on it… 

Because, it does.

A Test You Can Pass Everytime

When bad things happen to folks who love Jesus, most folks have a crisis of faith. They just can’t imagine why God would allow something difficult or tragic to come into the life of someone who is really living for the Lord. The first question anyone asks when hard things come is, “Why?” That’s what everyone wants to know. They want to know why - which is understandable, but also unanswerable. You see, God hardly ever invites any of us to the ‘why-things-happen’ meetings. We simply don’t know why God allows bad stuff to happen. When the world caves in, the real question folks ought to be asking is, “What?” In other words, when bad things happen to someone you love, or even to your very own little self, the first question should not be, “Why is this happening?” but, “What do I need to do next?”

I know, I know, hardly any of us deals with our problems in that way. When it hits the fan in our lives, most folks usually go through all kinds of emotions ranging from fear and worry to anger and panic. Now, obviously those type of emotional reactions don’t do any good, whatsoever, but it’s really easy for us to recognize that right now, when we’re comfortably seated in front of our computers. The problem is that when we’re in the middle of tragedy or trouble, we don’t really think all that rationally. 

So, here’s my idea: Let’s take advantage of this little window of time where things are relatively chill and use this opportunity to completely redefine hard times. Let’s figure out how the Lord wants us to see our difficulties and troubles right now, so that maybe we can short circuit our natural tendency to freak out. So, without further ado…

Lee Presents: A More Accurate (And Biblical) Outlook On Hard Times

• Hard times are not the end of the world, because I belong to another world that’s eternal. (Philippians 3:20)
• Difficulties do not have the power or potential to ruin my life, because God is in control of my life and is working everything together for my absolute best. (Romans 8:28)
• Tragedies do not mean God has abandoned me, because He promised He would never leave me or forsake me. (Hebrews 13:5)
• The bad things that are happening to me are not punishment for my sin, because Jesus took my place on the cross and paid for all of my sin once and for all. (1 Peter 2:24)
• Problems do not mean that God hates me or is mean to me, because He showed His love for me in the fact that He gave His Son for me. (John 3:16)

The following is what the Bible actually does say about problems:

Hard times are experiments. Seriously. It’s not that God is mistreating you or leaving you or punishing you or hating you. When you go through a hard time, it’s God making you into something. He’s testing out your faith. He’s showing you where you are and where you need to grow. It’s just like an experiment in Science class. We believe certain things - but how do those theories stand up in our heart when the heat is turned up? You see, God isn’t lashing out at you - He’s training you! God isn’t punishing you or abandoning you - He’s making you better at this! Now, doesn’t that just absolutely change the game?! I mean, seriously. If I know for a fact that my hard times are just experiments and not some crisis where God has become mean or left me high and dry, then I can face them in a completely different way! If I know for a fact that this is just a practical experiment for my faith, then I can not only face it, but I can face it with joy, knowing that there is no doubt I’ll make it to the other side!

That being said, check out what James says in Chapter 1 of his book: “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”

Guys, hard times are just a work out! God is training you. He wants to develop your muscles and reflexes. He wants us to get better at simply hanging on to our faith, and hanging in there. Now, that’s a test you can pass. 

A Priceless, Top-Secret Concept

Do you want to know a top-secret truth of the Christian life that almost no one knows? Now, when I say almost no one knows this thing, I’m not exaggerating even a little bit. This is not hyperbole. This is one of those absolutely life-changing concepts that only a few people are truly in on. The funny thing is that this truth is not ‘top-secret’ because it’s sensitive information that only a select few folks should be allowed to know. In fact, the reason only a few people know this is because there aren’t that many people who want to know it. Thing is, this concept is so life-alteringly (pretty sure that’s a word) important that I would put it up in the Top 10 or maybe even Top 5 things every Christian should be thinking about pretty much all the time.

Whoa. That’s big, right? Okay, well after all that build up, here it is: Stay Teachable.

Now, I know what you’re thinking… you’re probably thinking, “That’s it? “Stay teachable” is in the Top 10 or even higher? What?” And look, I know it sounds a little anti-climactic, (especially after all that build-up) but hear me out. 

People who knew and walked with Jesus in the New Testament were referred to as ‘disciples.’ That word ‘disciple’ simply means ‘student’ and that’s what it means to know Him and have a life with Him because He is a Teacher. In other words, He knows how to be, and I don’t, so if I start hanging around Him, I need to understand that I am putting myself under a Teacher who expects to be able to tell me what to do and how to be. 

Almost everyone who comes to know Christ is all about being taught and guided when they first get on this whole Jesus thing. They approach the Scriptures with a teachable attitude. They approach their spiritual leaders with that same teachable attitude and most importantly, they approach Jesus that way as well. The problem actually comes from their spiritual growth. When most Christians grow in the Lord, they oftentimes get to a place where they basically think they have it down and they stop listening to anyone. They don’t listen to their leaders, the Scriptures and eventually even the Lord! 

The following is a very important and very sophisticated spiritual maxim that I want to tell myself everyday, and it goes like this: “Until my heart stops beating, I ain’t there yet.” In other words, humility is vital. I need to wake up everyday longing for the wisdom of Jesus. I need to recognize the fact that I absolutely have to depend an other-worldly brilliance, insight and purity of motive which I don’t posses to come into my heart from outside my heart and tell me how to be. I need Jesus everyday. I am staggeringly dependent. I haven’t arrived. On my own, I am not wise. I need Him and I need the Scriptures and I need wise people in my life who love me and when I get all of those things, I need to permanently put myself under the yoke of being taught. I am not a professional. I am a permanent student. I am a disciple.

The Secret of Thankfulness

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. I love this holiday. And look, it’s not because of the turkey or the football or even the gathering of family together… no, it’s just the heart of the thing. I love the idea that we set aside a whole day for such a beautiful emotion as thankfulness. When you think about it, we Christians ought to have the market cornered on giving thanks. Of all the people in the world, we should be the most thankful. In fact, when you consider what we believe about what we have in light of what we deserve, the only appropriate response is gratitude. 

Even so, let’s be honest: We’re not thankful all the time. Gratitude may be appropriate, but it doesn’t always come naturally. I know that in my heart, sometimes thankfulness is not only absent, but I find myself filled with nothing but pure, visceral bitterness. Now, the Bible says that the will of God for us is literally to be thankful all the time, no matter what happens, (1 Thessalonians 5:18) but the question is, how can we possibly do that?! How can we be thankful even when we are in the midst of a situation that completely sucks and feels totally unfair, unreasonable or even tragic and wrong? Well, this may sound weird, but the answer is time travel

Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “Whoa, time out. Did you just say time travel?” - and yes, I totally did, but hang with me, because I’m going somewhere with this.

About seven months after Christy and I got married, my mom walked out on my dad. The next year or so of my life was the hardest season I have ever been through. I couldn’t believe that God allowed this to happen to my family, and as I watched everything I had always leaned on fall apart in front of me, I was eaten up with anger, bitterness and confusion. Why us? Why now?  

Now, I’m 32 years old. I’ve been married for over 10 years and have a family of my own. When I look back on all that happened, I see everything differently. I still don’t know why it all happened, but I am able to see amazing and beautiful things that came out of the ashes of that mess. For instance, Christy and I have an awesome marriage. She’s my best friend and the two of us are absolutely pouring our hearts into this relationship. We are completely committed. We are on an intense mission to give everything we have to this relationship every day, and honestly, one of the reasons we feel that way is that we lived through the emotional devastation of divorce right there at the beginning of our marriage and it steeled us for the life we now fight for and enjoy. Jesus used that disaster to give me something beautiful I may have never had otherwise. In a way, now that I’m on the other side of that hurt, I’m thankful for what happened, because it ensured that I would resolve never to do the same thing.

In Revelation 5, we get a glimpse into the future. It’s like traveling through time into heaven at the end of everything when there’s no more problems, pain, drama, trouble, poverty, sickness, sin, death or tears. Jesus is seated on His throne as the unrivaled King of every molecule in the Universe and everyone in heaven is singing a song to Him that goes like this: “Worthy is the Lamb, who was slain, to receive power and wealth and wisdom and strength and honor and glory and praise!”

You see, when this world is over, and we’re all worshiping Jesus together in heaven, we’re going to be on the other side of all of our problems. Heaven is going to clear up the confusion and unravel the mystery and we’ll be able to see all of the beautiful things Jesus was bringing out of our struggles. In the end, everyone will be thanking Him for the amazing ways He turned pain into praise. I believe that Revelation gives us that glimpse as a time traveling promise to help us have a thankful heart right now, in the middle of the hurt. One day you’ll see it. On the other side, you’ll be thankful. Why not go ahead and trust Him now? I know you don’t understand it all yet, but why not go ahead and believe in the future? Let’s beat the rush and thank Him today.